Things I'd Rather Do...

Okay. Give me a situation that I dislike, I'll be able to counteract. In other words I'll come up with what I'd rather do and that'll be a fact!

I'd rather stare at a lava lamp for 1 hour, 43 minutes, and 12.7 seconds.
I'd rather put all my clothes on backwards, including my underwear and socks, and walk downtown looking like a moron.
I'd rather eat shit and die.
I'd rather wear my left slipper on my right foot and my right slipper on my left foot.
I'd rather eat a tube of toothpaste and drink Listerine.
I'd rather put an apostrophe where it doesn't belong.
I'd rather smell snake piss.
I'd rather have an onion fall on my head.
I'd rather eat cold Lunchables.
I'd rather blow a fart out my nose.
I'd rather walk 15 miles that way.
I'd rather eat the skin of a kiwi.
I'd rather wear a vest.
I'd rather be a metronome. (Everyone hates 'em.)
I'd rather play "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" for the NES.
I'd rather be late for my own funeral.
I'd rather ride a plastic tricycle down the Eisenhower at 3.5 mph...blindfolded.
I'd rather have a staring contest with an owl.
I'd rather crap a crap that I've never crapped before.
I'd rather memorize all the elements in the periodic table of the elements, including the name of the element, atomic weight, symbol, number and what kind of element it is.
I'd rather go on an archaeological dig with someone who hates digging and listen to them complain about digging.
I'd rather count the threads in a 10,000 thread-counted rug and confirm if it actually has 10,000 threads.
While I'm at that, I'd rather count the blades of grass in 1 square mile.
I'd rather freeze my face.
I'd rather have a siamese twin attached to my ass.

See? There are lots of things I'd rather do. But in the end, we have to do what has to be done. Usually, there is no way away from it. If there is, that path of not doing it may seem worth taking, but doesn't work out in the end. Sometimes if it isn't dealt with, what you didn't do earlier, it could bite you in the ass. Truly, you could regret it. So...do it.